For those who do not know, Co-Star is an app that gives you your daily horoscope and star chart. I have had the app for a few months now, but I only use it to check my chart whenever someone asks me for my astrological placements. I am not even sure I believe in astrology. For me, this app is just for fun.

But this week, I have decided to do what Co-Star tells me to. Maybe it will give me some greater meaning or some connection to something larger than me. Perhaps it will do nothing. I truly do not know. 

Here is my chart. 

Now, let us see if following this silly little app will make my life any better. 

Day 1: “Look for situations that help you be the best version of yourself.”

Do: lemonade, cartwheels, parasols

Don’t: grifts, follow the leader, face value

To start my day off, I had some lemonade. Since I’ve been trying to save money, I made it myself with my roommate’s lemon juice, sugar, and water. It was too cold and, for some reason, too sour. I guess that’s what happens when you make things yourself. Unfortunately, I do not own a parasol, so instead, I drank my lemonade from my Jane Austen mug — she had parasols in her books, right?

Next on the list were cartwheels. Co-Star used a plural, so I decided to do ten just to be safe. I soon realized that I should have had my lemonade after my cartwheels because once I was done, I felt pretty nauseous and had to sit down. 

I do not usually do grifts, so that part was no big deal. I almost bought a copy of F. Scott Fitzgerald’s “The Pat Hobby Stories” but decided against it because I was not supposed to take things at face value. In this case, the stars were in my favor: I found a cheaper used version online. And finally, I decided not to go to one of my org meetings (even though my Big was going) because I did not want to follow the leader. 

Even after all of that, I do not feel like much has changed. I just feel cold, bored, and a bit dizzy. But it’s only day one. 

Day 2: “Normal doesn’t exist.”

Do: big tips, soft focus, hydration

Don’t: insist, invasive questions, leftovers

Yesterday, I made sure to finish all of my food so that I would not have leftovers to eat today. Instead, I made all of my meals fresh and made sure to drink lots of water. The second part proved to be a bit of a challenge, seeing that I lost my water bottle a few days ago. This meant I had to drink my water out of a cup, a challenge I found to be both degrading and beneath me. However, today, normal does not exist, so I figured that this change in routine would make the stars happy. 

Then, I took some pictures with my phone. I couldn’t find anything to use on the lens itself, so I edited the photos I took to look like they were taken in soft focus, which I thought was close enough. If I am being honest, I am not a photographer, so looking at the pictures now makes me feel more embarrassed than anything else. 

I made sure to steer clear of invasive questions or insistences. To be honest, I feel little to no desire to do the things that Co-Star demands I avoid. Though this does make my job easier, I worry that this inhibits my horoscope experience.

Day 3: “Your heart is the most unreliable resource in your body right now.”

Do: kombucha, takeout, cartoons

Don’t: scrutiny, crumbs in bed, steel wool 

I was very excited when I saw my Co-Star for the day. I wanted an excuse to do some self-care, and this was it! After class, I went to Cava and picked up a little takeout for lunch. Kombucha is not my favorite drink, but I bought a bottle anyway, and it ended up being alright. And once I got home, I relaxed by turning on the “Harley Quinn Valentine’s Special.” 

So far, this has been my favorite day in my Co-Star journey. While I am still on the fence about the legitimacy of astrology, I will admit that today it gave me an excuse to treat myself. I know I do not need an app’s permission to relax, but it was a pleasant surprise waking up this morning and knowing that I would be able to get takeout and watch cartoons later. 

Day 4: “There is beauty in a timely ending.”

Do: full disclosure, ripe fruit, long kiss

Don’t: cold war, fisticuffs, downplaying

Today was a little bit rough. I started the day by having a ripe banana in my cereal for breakfast. My roommate invited me out to go to a bakery, but I decided to stay in, saying, “full disclosure, my bed is too comfy to leave right now.” 

I am not entirely sure what Co-Star meant by saying to avoid “Cold War,” which seems both too late and out of my hands. Similarly, I do not get into fights on a regular basis. I did try not to downplay any of my emotions throughout the day. Although this required conscious effort, it seemed to be helpful in the long run. 

Here comes the tricky part. The stars demanded that I participate in a long kiss. Unfortunately, there is no one with whom I can share a long kiss. I thought about ways I could get around it but to no avail. They all seemed either incredibly unpleasant or too embarrassing to ever speak of, much less write about in a newspaper column. So I am sorry to have disappointed you, Co-Star, but I will have to do without the long kiss today. 

Day 5: “If they want you, they’ll let you know.” 

Do: scents, silk, second chances

Don’t: guard up, preemptive strikes, generalizations

I feel like the stars have some large special romantic plan for me because this is the second day in a row where my horoscope had something to do with romance. Yesterday was a kiss, and today, someone is supposed to tell me they want me. Unfortunately, I went the entire day without a confession of love, so it looks like they might have been wrong. 

However, that does not mean I was completely at a loss. I ran out of perfume, so I made sure to wear my most scented lip gloss and lotion. I also wore a silk undershirt and gave a television show that I did not like the first time another chance. I would not say that my opinion has changed, but it did give me something to do.

I also tried to let my guard down a bit. I decided to forgo my usual daily schedule and just let myself do whatever I felt like doing. I got a croissant and some blueberries, both of which I have not had in a while, and listened to some fun and freeing music. Despite the lack of love confessions, I would consider today a success. 

Day 6: “You have no idea how much love is out there.” 

Do: endings, bad poetry, bonfires

Don’t: expectations, ruthlessness, ultimatums

As I near the end of my Co-Star journey, I cannot help but think that this app is incredibly …  random. I feel as though half the things I have been asked to do are normal and contribute to my mental health and well-being. The other half seem like they were picked from a magician’s hat. 

For example, I was told to do “endings” today. What kind of endings, you might ask? Who knows. I decided to watch the finale of one of my favorite shows and hoped that was enough. It’s currently Monday, so I’m not sure where I could find a bonfire. But I’m making up for it by writing some terrible poetry here and now. 

Oh pumpkin pencil on my desk

Scattered everywhere making a mess

Why don’t you sit down and rest

I beg of you, please try your best

Pretty terrible, huh?

This probably goes without saying, but I am quite certain nobody ever wants to do expectations, ruthlessness, or ultimatums. Therefore, I simply tried to be more conscious of my “don’t” list — not that I would want any of those anyways. 

Day 7: “You are not a puppet.” 

Do: newsletters, skill shares, calluses

Don’t: boasting, interruptions, take credit

We have arrived at the final day of my Co-Star journey. What a wild ride it has been. I started my day by reading a newsletter. This made me feel both productive and a little disillusioned. I have calluses on my hands, and while I am not sure what Co-Star wanted me to do with them, they are there, meaning I completed that part of my task.

I will admit that I occasionally find myself bragging about my life (not that I have much to brag about). Therefore, I made sure to keep any boasting to a minimum. I also made sure to actively listen and not interrupt anyone. And finally, I did not take credit for any work that was not mine. I probably would not have done that in the first place, but it was either that or not taking credit for work that was mine so … lesser of two evils. 

When I saw the “skill shares” part of my day, I thought, “does Co-Star include ads in their horoscopes?” I did not want to pay for any official skill share videos, so instead, I watched a Crash Course video and called it a day.

Now, do I think I gained anything from following Co-Star for a week? I am not sure. I think I was able to do some fun things that I enjoyed, but who is to say I would not have done so on my own? I certainly do not feel any luckier, nor do I feel more aligned with my spirit or anything like that. In fact, I feel mostly the same. 

I am not saying that astrology or Co-Star is dumb. I think that if you enjoy those things, then you should participate wholeheartedly. But for me, I would rather do things on my own than live my life based on an app’s instructions.

Photo Courtesy of Josh Rangel from Unsplash