It was a typical Thursday night of doomscrolling on TikTok in bed to pass the time — an easy thing to do on most nights, since I have a light course load this quarter. I waded through the vast content sea, sailing through its open waters, encountering wild beasts of all kinds, like restaurant reviews and recipe recommendations, until one video in particular caught my eye: “Blue Whale coffee shop in downtown La Jolla is holding a live DJ set at golden hour on Saturday, Feb 1st!”
As a 22-year-old live music lover, this event was right up my alley. I needed something to get me out of the house and a place where I could vibe with people my age. It’s my last year at UC San Diego, so one of my goals is to attend as many events in the area as possible before I step into the real world. I sent the event details to my close friend and KSDT Radio show co-host, Andres. He said he was in, and just like that, I had Saturday plans to look forward to.
On the day of, Andres and I, along with my roommate Decheng, headed over to Blue Whale. The bus ride down to downtown La Jolla was a glorious journey with relaxing views — the orange glow and beautiful sunset backdrop that any UCSD student knows fondly. As I stared out the window, I couldn’t help but feel nostalgic and thankful for the time I have spent on campus, knowing that it will soon be coming to a close.
When we got off the bus, the event was hard to miss. We heard the music first: a driving beat supported by a feathery synth melody. Then, as we rounded the corner onto Kline Street, we saw a large crowd of people outside the coffee shop: a quaint, light-green building with a triangle-shaped roof that could have easily been mistaken for a house without the crowd. The DJ was set up outside on the porch playing house music, absolutely locked-in on the turntable.
The venue was packed but not uncomfortable. As I looked around, everyone was dancing, swinging, frat-flicking, and sipping on the dark cherry matcha lattes they got from inside. Unexpectedly, the scene immediately put me in a good mood — watching others enjoy the company of friends while dancing filled me with a sense of relief and fulfillment, like I had finally found what I was searching for. I welcomed it with open arms.
I joined in on the dancing, swaying back and forth while pumping my fist into the air — the Frat Flick Lite, as I like to call it. I felt a surge of energy and turned towards my friends. Fortunately, they did not leave me hanging and started bopping their heads with me.
The sun was now touching the glistening water, its glow obstructed by taller buildings in the area — but that didn’t curb the party’s energy. At one point, someone in the crowd leaped up onto the stage to ask the DJ if he could get a turn at mixing, and to my surprise, he agreed. The guy was pretty good, transitioning from one tune to the next and keeping the whole crowd jumping, until someone accidentally stepped on the cord and stopped the entire set.
In the momentary silence, I looked around and noticed for the first time that evening that most of the people at this event were older than us — probably in their late 20s. But even with this seemingly small age difference, I felt a ravine worth of distance between us. It felt like they were attached to an entirely different world that they were somehow gatekeeping from me. I felt like I was not allowed in there — not quite yet. They simultaneously seemed like they were more carefree but also had more responsibilities.
Yet, here they were, doing the exact same thing as us. Some had come with friends like me, some with partners, and others came solo; no matter whose company we were in, we were all there to enjoy some good music.
The music turned back on as golden hour transitioned into blue hour. The sky ushered in a relaxed, calming atmosphere.
The music began to die down, and the crowd slowly dispersed. We grabbed some drinks before leaving — I caved and got the same dark cherry matcha latte as everyone else, and Decheng got a tres leches latte.
As we walked, I thought more about the people I saw and who I would become upon graduating from UCSD. A million thoughts ran through my head. Will I find myself at similar events like this? Are these people also like me, trying to make sense of who they are by going to more social events?
This event was starkly distinct from my earlier college years spent at dorm parties with kids exactly the same age as me, at exactly the same place in life. Suddenly, I realized how much of an adult I was becoming, venturing out into the real world, trying to replicate these controlled, almost lab-like social experiences in the real world. Who did I identify more with: the person I wanted to become or the person I was growing out of? Am I ready? Am I scared of that?
Thank god I didn’t delete TikTok. Maybe this was another sign of me growing up and gaining mental autono–
“Hey, do you guys wanna hit up 858 Burger?” Andres asked. I hadn’t realized it, but we had walked all the way to the Taco Stand.
I paused for a moment, stunned. “Yeah, I’m down,” I said.
