Gotta Bounce


We know these moments all too well: The sweatpants are just a tad too comfortable, and oh no, the 20-minute nap you planned just so happened to turn into a two-hour snooze fest, sending you into the delirious post-nap hangover state. Or maybe you’ve already dragged yourself out of the house for a (unfortunate) night out on the town, and the 80-year-old soul within is saying you need to go home and sleep. Not to worry, Lifestyle has a wide variety of excuses for you to use to get out of everything, from the dinner you were never really excited about to the club-hopping adventure you know you don’t need in your life right now.

When the bed is calling your name more than that margarita at Taco Tuesday…

  • Unfortunately, I can’t find my “actual” pants.
  • I just made plans with this cup of tea last week, and it’s too late for me to cancel.
  • You mean to tell me Taco Tuesday happens every Tuesday?
  • Sorry, I got lost on my way trying to get out of this comforter cave I made.
  • My Netflix is acting up, it inconveniently keeps playing the next episode. It always gets really glitchy every time Gilmore Girls is on.

When you’re out at a bar and can’t do another round…

  • My succulent only lets me water it on Fridays; I really need to go home and check to make sure it’s doing alright.
  • Did I forget to mention? Saturday nights are meant for FaceTiming my dog back home.
  • *casually picks up phone* “Hello, Mom?”
  • There’s a bunch of memes I need to get through before lecture on Monday.
  • A little more complex: Get the bartender in on a plan to give the last call two hours prior to closing time.

When there’s no point in waking up for that bougie brunch…

  • Is this place gluten-free, wheat-free, dairy-free and vegan?
  • The Barefoot Contessa is only on during this time of morning, and I really can’t miss it.
  • I need to finish this box of Frosted Flakes before it expires, so sorry.
  • *four hours later* I just woke up, did I miss it?
  • I couldn’t find any Ubers that could pick me up this early on a Saturday morning.
  • I got caught up petting a pug outside my apartment.

And if all else fails, there is never any shame in just saying “no.” No explanation needed if you gotta go, you gotta go. Never feel that there is an obligation to have to be or to do everything, all at once — allow your best introverted self out whenever needed.