Senior Staff Writer

Politicians and bullshit are as American as apple pie. From the national level to the state level to the city level, every election is full of bluster over “”hot-ticket”” issues where often directly opposing “”facts”” are spun into oblivion to invoke an emotional response. The upcoming A.S. Council elections are no exception, and so far, this year’s flock of candidates looks to represent business as usual, with the same election-time promises and issues being dusted off and put on display.

One of the most contested issues this year, and every year, is the diversity of UCSD’s population. On the one hand, UCSD has some of the most active and effective student programs in the UC system and the nation in terms of diversity awareness and cultural celebration, which keeps UCSD visible in the eyes of like-minded groups worldwide. However, in terms of actual admissions, UCSD is doing a rotten job of admitting a representative population of students. In terms of admission, the ever-present cry against “”white male privilege”” has some basis.

In terms of student programs, ASUCSD can do quite a bit, and has traditionally done a good and thorough job in the past. But at the heart of the matter of admissions, Associated Students is impotent. The highly contested (and quite expensive) high school conferences ASUCSD currently provides for increased diversity have had a small effect, but for the most part, all ASUCSD can do is lobby university administrators, who have a track record of being about as effective as someone trying to injure Arnold Schwarzenegger by throwing pennies at his head. And any politician who says otherwise is lying through his or her teeth.

An issue which should not be, but always is inextricably linked to diversity, is free speech — a topic that has been forced into the spotlight recently by pornographic events shown on SRTV. Unlike admissions, ASUCSD can actually control its student-funded media outlets and has proven itself by doing so in the past. When dealing with offerings from the Koala or SRTV that push the envelope, ASUCSD is prevented by national law from restricting funding based on content, but usually finds some excuse to do just that under some other auspices. This year’s A.S. Council did an adequate but unpopular job of dealing with the “”free speech”” issue of “”Koala TV”” by removing the “”free speech”” portion of its complaint and telling SRTV to do what it said because A.S. Council was the one holding the checks. It’s useful to remember that any time a politician says “”I’m for free speech, but …”” they’re not for free speech. And any politician who says otherwise is lying through his or her teeth.

Those issues aside, all of the other hot topics in the upcoming election amount to student preference over how to balance ASUCSD’s $2 million budget. Every politician under the sun will state a desire to take money away from “”elite groups”” and give that money to “”services which benefit all UCSD students,”” but usually this is politician code for taking money away from student programs they personally don’t use and giving it to student programs they do use. If money was actually allocated based on how many students use a particular program, ASUCSD would exclusively fund concerts, the more popular publications and O.A.S.I.S. Obviously some degree of balance is needed to give other underrepresented programs a chance, but this is by definition a purely selfish and political decision, so beware of any hack politicians who say they’ll increase funding to programs that benefit “”the people,”” or “”all of UCSD,”” because they simply will not. And any politician who says otherwise is, again, lying through his or her teeth. In fact, in this time of budget crises, informed voters should question exactly what programs get cut to fund any extravagant campaign promises.

Apart from balancing its budget, ASUCSD has no actual power. Nowhere is this issue more prevalent than on the single issue all UCSD students can agree on, that of parking.

Every year for the past 10 years, UCSD’s student politicians have promised better parking for students, and they have never, ever delivered. More than anything, this is due to the fact that the average UCSD student has unreasonable expectations about parking. Let’s face it, every student wants to pull onto campus five minutes before class and walk right into a classroom, but unless you park on the sidewalk or ride a motorcycle, this is as unattainable as increasing student diversity through ASUCSD lobbying.

UCSD parking is not required to, has not, will not, and never will answer to any student or student group. An advisory board on parking issues exists, and it is responsible for some small changes made in the past, but UCSD will never have affordable and convenient parking unless a large wave destroys the foundations of every building and the reconstruction effort includes underground parking. And any politician who says otherwise is lying through his or her teeth.

So where does that leave A.S. Council as a whole? It can balance a budget with its own money and give it to student programs it likes, and it is a somewhat effective lobbyist when working on student-controlled campus issues, like the recent success with renewing the co-op lease agreements. Given this modest power, Associated Students has always, and will always, attract the next generation of politicians who are eager to change the world while filling their resumes. To accomplish this, they will lie or mislead voters on any subject necessary to get them into office.

But let us not blame or resent them for their election-time bullshit; let us instead celebrate their patriotism for carrying on this important American tradition. After all, the optimism that creates all of these false election promises is actually responsible for most of what’s great about the student programs at UCSD.