Film Review

The quality of a film is often negatively correlated with the number of genres it tries to straddle. “”Head over Heels”” could be described as a romantic-crazy-drama-comedy with action elements.

Courtesy of Universal Pictures

It is the concept of one “”girl next door”” (Monica Potter) living with four models, and she just happens to be good-looking herself. OK, fine. This is America, after all.

Add living across the road from the vague exhibitionist Mr. Perfect (Freddie Prinze Jr.), who may or may not be a serial killer. Then progress to pile up the cliches at a higher rate than your average Bon Jovi lyric.

A sense of humor based on bodily functions and discharges can make for funny films. It’s just that it’s been done so much funnier, so many times before. That goes for every potential laugh-inducing element of this film: the makeover scene (“”Clueless””), the spying on neighbors (“”Friends””) and the list just goes on.

In the last instance, the film suffers from trying to do everything at once and never really manages to achieve anything. The only thing it has built to excess is the melodrama with quivering lips and knees.

The action scene has been toned down to an insipid level. The models try to act but become, at best, caricatures of themselves next to the more developed main characters.

Guys, they don’t even have breasts, cause they’re models, and models are too skinny to produce any luscious cleavage to speak of.

I tried to amuse myself by reading meaning into the Kate Moss-skinny script, but to no avail — unless the statements “”Women can’t be both beautiful and smart at the same time; they need men to save them”” and “”Men with foreign accents are villains”” count as anything worthy of “”meaning.”” To me they don’t.

If you do have an irresistible urge to expose yourself to this film, at least hold back until it’s released on video, so you can cringe in the comfort of your own home. Or alternatively, go on Valentine’s Day, because here’s your chance to make out in the dark cinema without missing anything at all.