As I write this column from Chicago, there is something odd going on outside. I say odd because despite the near-blizzard-force snow pelting down (OK, maybe that’s a bit of an exaggeration, but it is bloody miserable) on the throngs of post-Thanksgiving shoppers, and the fact that the streets are packed with a ton of people, everyone is in a really, really good mood. I suppose it’s that thing we call “holiday spirit.” That, or the fact that it’s one of the biggest sale periods of the year and shoppers are going crazy.
Every year, I know it’s about time to get in the “holiday spirit” when Oprah Winfrey has her “Favorite Things” episode. This is, quite possibly, the one and only “Oprah” episode of the year that is of any importance. In just 60 minutes, Oprah goes through her list of favorite stocking stuffers and plays Santa to her audience, showering them with everything from Blackberries to Burberry coats, Frederic Fekkai hair products to 30-inch LCD TVs. Truth be told, this episode is comparable to a religious pilgrimage experience (picture 200 women crying, screaming and flailing their arms about), one that starts to build my excitement about Christmas and encourages hour-long conversations with my sister to plan our debut on next year’s show.
Thanks to Oprah and her show, for the next month or so I do the whole getting-into-the-spirit-of-things thing; I love putting up the Christmas tree at home, baking Christmas cookies and mince pies. Hell, I even love the kitschy tinsel.
But getting into the spirit of things is really an excuse for marketers to tap in on those who are starry-eyed from all the red and green. Marketers make the most of the season and the spending habits of the public, and manage to successfully lure them into the Christmas trap. Christmas is the season for losing our inhibitions. No, I’m not talking about getting drunk off the mulled wine and champagne or those fashion faux pas, aka the people who wear snowmen and reindeer sweaters. Forget about Christmas being the season for giving; in my opinion, it’s the season of unnecessary “best of” compilations, Tim Allen movies and Christmas-themed albums by struggling recording artists. And for some obscure reason — which will leave me wondering as I drift in and out of my tryptophan-induced naps — these movies and albums always do really well at the box office and on the music charts.
While the holiday season is an exciting time for Hollywood, as this week’s holiday movie previews will attest to, it’s also a time for some really abysmal movies to hit the silver screen. Granted, the majority of these movies are what we call “family movies,” but a family movie isn’t one that substitutes gentle, family humor for bad plots, unfunny scripts and unnecessary slapstick. Nevertheless, “Christmas with the Kranks” managed to rank third in this weekend’s box-office earnings. Of course, following in the true tradition of Christmas family movies, be sure to see endless repeats of these holiday movies on TV for years to come, because it’s the fact that these movies are about Christmas that guarantees them such success. Perhaps if Oliver Stone decided to further butcher “Alexander” and dress Colin Farrell in tinsel, the film would have done a lot better in the box offices. In all seriousness though, we ought to hold the same expectations for our movies during the holiday season, not just drop those expectations when we get into the spirit of things.
It’s not only movies though; come Christmas, record stores are flooded with “best of” albums. There’s nothing wrong with a “best of” album for the most part, unless your name is Rod Stewart or you’re a band that’s been around for two years. For a man who’s well past his sell-by date and has not actually had any hits since about 1992, it’s a wonder how every Christmas, Stewart still manages to produce a “best of” album. How many “best of” albums can one man produce? A quick glimpse of the “best of” list this season shows that almost anyone, regardless of how long they’ve been recording or how many actual hits they have, can put together a “best of” album. The other option for those who haven’t been on the MTV rotation long enough (and by long enough, I mean 8 months) is the “Christmas hits” album, which can always make the most of the holiday season. Do we really need to hear Clay Aiken singing “O Holy Night”? Marketers know that putting the magical words “best of” and “Christmas Hits” on a CD cover during Christmas is going to produce a guaranteed winner.
So why does this happen? We know that those “Christmas hits” albums will only be in the stereo for a maximum of two weeks before they’re placed back on the CD rack and never listened to again. We know how bad those Christmas movies are going to be. We also know that Rod Stewart is probably going to come out with another “best of” album next year. So why do we get suckered into the world of Christmas marketing? It’s because we’re so busy getting into the holiday spirit, and being blinded from the red and green, the mistletoe and the old man in the red suit at the same time. Get into the holiday spirit by all means — just don’t lose your good taste in your choice of entertainment.