True Love Defeats All Obstacles

Can love truly conquer all? In light of the shocking split of Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise, I would say it is not very probable that love can endure for a lifetime.

With the news of their impending divorce, my hopes for enduring love were dashed and my faith was shattered. They were married for 11 years and still appeared so much in love. They were the marriage “”dream team”” that, in my mind, was going to prove that love could endure any obstacle and conquer all.

But news of their breakup brought a host of doubts. The high-profile split was the reason I began my quest to discover why. Why are more than fifty percent of marriages ending in divorce? Why isn’t love enduring? Why, why, why?

The biggest problem I see is that marriage does not come equipped with a handbook on how to make it work. Instead, our perspective of marriage is deeply entrenched in society’s views on what marriage should and should not be.

It is clear to me that modern society views divorce as an everyday function, yet in my grandparents’ generation, divorce was not accepted. It was deemed wrong and only viewed as the last resort. That there were fewer divorces in my grandparents’ era doesn’t mean that people loved each other more, but that they were constrained by society’s expectations to make the effort to work through marital problems.

Now it is accepted as normal for people to fall in and out of love and that divorce is just an expected outcome. The attempt to try to fix the marriage isn’t considered as normal as racing to a divorce attorney to be the one who files first. It has become accepted that since people are bound to change, things are not expected to last and that marriage does not necessarily need to last either.

So I pose this question: Why has our society’s view of marriage changed so drastically within only a few decades?

The possible answer is that our society has become consumed with the idea of being happy, that there is an ultimate state of happiness just within our reach once we have that perfect relationship, car or job.

Thus when the going gets tough, it’s no big deal. The mentality is to bail out of marriage because problems and suffering are not something we should have to put up with. After all, we are meant to be happy and to seek what makes us happy, no matter the cost.

I’m sorry to say it, but life is not one big, happy ride at a theme park. There are mountains to climb and hardships to conquer.

It is not too much to ask that this mentality of working through real-life hardships be applied to love and marriage.

What ever happened to “”for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health””? Wedding vows do not say “”in good times, but when the bad times come, it’s time to hit the road.”” They say “”in good times and in bad.””

I think this is the part everyone forgets. Love and marriage are not easy and it is not a fairy tale with a fairy-tale ending. In order to make love last, it requires work and compromise.

The outlook for everlasting love is certainly grim. People all around us are divorcing. From celebrities to people we know, we are being shown that love does not last, that it falters and breaks down when faced of obstacles and hardships.

Investing in a relationship and in the promise of everlasting love sounds scary. It is downright risky. But then again, life is unpredictable and inherently risky, so why not take the risk?

Are love and marriage worth the risk of hardship and pain? I say yes, take the risk.

What is life without making that all-important connection with another person? All the odds are stacked against enduring love, but I am still betting on love to conquer all.

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