Imagine the scene: One chiseled reality star — the master of ceremonies — looms above the crowd of a dance tent, shouting, “Bein’ a guido is a way of life!” while you, self-obsessed student, in the midst of your Popov binge, gyrate amongst the sweaty masses, ignoring the hilarity of who is actually at the root of it all because irony doesn’t exist when you’re drunk, and "Jersey Shore" makes complete, total and undeniable sense. Fist pumping isn’t amusing — it’s serious business, and more satisfying than you could possibly understand.

This, my friends, is the solution to all our problems.

After budget cuts, racial tension, protests and entirely too much Drake at last year’s Sun God Festival, UCSD needs some serious help. Add a bad shut-in and study reputation and it’s obvious how much guidance is truly necessary. But we’re not totally lost! All our ill-spirited campus needs to start fresh is one event, one moment, to bring us back to consciousness and out of our depressing slump.

Which brings me back to my unbelievable discovery. But first, let me tell you about my summer; it’s to blame for my life-altering epiphany.

I mostly did nothing, but damn, it was the most glorious nothingness that anyone could possibly enjoy. I reveled in nothingness, rolled around in it, kicked its ass and then fell in love with it all over again. I became a pop culture connoisseur, devouring entertainment’s gourmet specials, along with its dollar menu. The highest highs and the lowest lows were equally at my disposal. I loved (and loathed) it all.

I defended Teen Mom. I started quoting Twin Peaks regularly. I read Perez Hilton. I learned to play a vuvuzela. I watched the first season of True Blood in one day flat. I began to mold my drink choices after Don Draper (Manhattan, please), and most importantly, I watched an uncomfortably large amount of Jersey Shore — the pantheon of Ke$ha-dominated garbage.  Through all of this, I became enlightened.

I may have been consuming cultural trash, but hell, I vomited up diamonds.

Through the culmination of my cultural studies, through digesting both the savory and the torrid, I have stumbled upon the insight necessary to determine what UCSD needs. My remedy is the key that will unleash the good fortune that we have all been waiting for.

While watching Jersey Shore last Thursday, it dawned on me: DJ Pauly D must play at Sun God. That’s it. The answer to the world’s problems.

I know what you’re thinking: What would make one hilariously coiffed Italian–American DJ so special? Why would an orange guido be our savior?

Think about it: This could be the event that brings UCSD back to life. You can’t go downhill from Pauly D. You can’t leave such belligerent moments in the dust, you can only expand upon it. In a year’s time you’ll see. We’ll all be proponents of the GTL regimen, and ya know, we might just become better from it.

Unlike most of our school’s population, Pauly D doesn’t care about an A on an organic chemistry midterm, he only cares about whether or not the girl in his bed is a grenade or not, and that’s a sentiment that UCSD could use a little more of.

So help me out, guys. Let’s start the campaign: DJ Pauly D for Sun God. Don’t let this year become so stale.

Let the Facebook groups begin!

[caption id="attachment_918" align="alignleft" width="300" caption="Senior forward Tony Choi saw his shot blocked late in UCSD’s Oct. 18 game versus Cal State Los Angeles. Choi’s unsuccessful shot was one of three failed Triton attempts to tie the score in the game’s final period, and the team lost 1-0 to the Golden Eagles. After the loss, the Tritons’ season record now stands at 4-5-3. (Daniel Caddell/Guardian)"][/caption]

MEN’S SOCCER — Coming off a two-game sweep of conference cellar dwellers Cal State East Bay, the Tritons faced off against teams at the top of their division last weekend. UCSD was unable to pull out an upset in either match, losing two consecutive one-goal road games.

After falling behind 3-0 on Oct. 16, the Tritons mounted a comeback in the final minutes against Cal State Dominguez Hills, but failed to erase the deficit.

Playing against Cal State Los Angeles on Oct. 18, UCSD was again unable to get on the board, taking the 1-0 defeat.

Following the series, UCSD’s conference record drops to 4-5-3 entering a game this Friday against Cal State San Bernardino.

Though UCSD’s defense played consistently well throughout Saturday’s match, the Triton offense struggled to create scoring opportunities on Sunday against the Toros.

In the first half, UCSD did not attempt a single shot on goal. On the other side of the ball, senior goalkeeper Peter Akman sent away all 14 of CSULA’s shots.

Starting the second half scoreless, the Golden Eagles wasted no time getting on the board, netting a goal in the 48th minute. The Tritons managed five shots in the second half, but none of them got through CSULA’s defense.

“I think that Cal State Los Angeles did a great job making it hard [for us] to get in a rhythm,” head coach John Pascale said. “They put a lot of pressure on the ball making life difficult for us. It was a combination of them being really good and us being a little off.”

Akman recorded a career-high 11 saves in the game, but UCSD’s offense was unable to support its goalkeeper in the Tritons’ fifth shutout of the season.

“Peter is an experienced goalkeeper, and he did for us what he’s been doing all year,” Pascale said. “His saves were excellent, but were well within his capabilities. He reads the game well and is very good technically.”

The Tritons struggled on both sides of the ball against CSUDH last Friday, allowing a season-high three scores. Outshooting UCSD 7-1 in the first half, the Toros scored on a header off the cross for a 1-0 lead.

UCSD didn’t get on the board until the Toros netted their third and final goal in the 79th minute. Senior midfielder Kyle Parton broke away from the defense for his first career goal, cutting CSUDH’s lead to 3-1 in the 85th minute.

Parton earned an assist on junior midfielder David Bakal’s goal in the 89th, which brought the Tritons within one score. However, UCSD’s early deficit proved too deep to overcome when they fell 3-2.

“Our approach was to put pressure on [Dominguez Hills] and not let them get in a rhythm. Dominguez Hills never felt comfortable, but they were able to capitalize on our mistakes,” Pascale said. “We were able to get a few goals late and definitely made it interesting, and our guys showed a lot of character, sticking with the game plan the whole time.”

The fourth-place Tritons now return home to face Cal State San Bernardino, sitting in third place, and fifth-place Cal Poly Pomona in the California Collegiate Athletic Association South Division. The last time they faced those two squads this season, the Tritons lost to the Coyotes 1-0 and beat the Broncos by the same score.

“At this point, we’ve seen everybody once this season, and we don’t feel like there’s anybody we can’t beat.”

Readers can contact Janani Sridharan at [email protected].

TENNIS — After defeating a doubles team from Sonoma State on Oct. 3 and earning the title of Intercollegiate Tennis Association West Region Doubles Champions, junior Armaun Emami and redshirt freshman Austin West advanced to the ITA National Small College Championship in Mobile, Ala. from Oct. 15 to Oct. 18.

The Triton duo emerged from the competition in fourth place after a strong showing on Oct. 15, but two losses the following day ended their run at an ITA national title.

In the championship’s opening match, Emami and West faced Midwestern State University’s Vjekoslav Stipanic and Bo Ziputovic in the quarterfinals. Stipanic and Ziputovic entered the match with a 10-1 record.

Undaunted by their opponent’s impressive record, Emami and West beat Stipanic and Ziputovic 7-6, 6-2 in a tough battle. After winning a gruelling first set with an 8-5 tiebreaker, the pair pulled away in the second set for an easy victory.

“It was a battle for that first set,” UCSD assistant coach Timmer Willing said. “After the tiebreaker win, they relaxed and settled in. We made a few adjustments to our strategy, and it took the other team out of their rhythm.”

West, in his first competitive season as a Triton, said he was happy with the dynamic between him and teammate Emami.

“It was the first time we’ve competed together in doubles, but I think our playing styles match up well,” West said. “We certainly complement each other.”

Emami finished No. 2 in the 2009 spring season with a 4-1 record. For most of the previous doubles season, he was paired with sophomore Chapman Chan, who is currently paired with redshirt junior Alex Placek.

On the tournament’s second day, Emami and West faced Francis Marion University’s Oshada Wijemanne and Dilshod Sharifi, the No. 2 seeded team in the championship. The opponent had trounced a team from Southern Indiana the previous day.

The game did not end well for Emami and West either, losing in straight sets 6-0, 6-0.

Following the difficult loss, Emami and West had the chance to salvage one last win at the ITA National Small College Championship with a match against Bloomsburg University’s Fernando Perez and Ricky Dove in the battle for third place.

However, 6-2 and 6-3 falls guaranteed the Triton duo a fourth-place finish at the championship.

“We’ll try to learn from our mistakes today,” West said. “It was a battle out there, and we need to figure out how to beat the better teams.”

UCSD’s last appearance at the ITA Championship was in 2007, when seniors Eric Rubens and Blake Meister clinched the doubles event.

The Tritons will participate in their next competition at the Southern California Intercollegiates in Los Angeles from Nov. 4 to Nov. 8. The five-day event will be the final competition of the Triton’s fall season before they take a break from competitive play until February.

Readers can contact Jessy at [email protected].

There comes a defining instant in every student’s life at which he can no longer stomach that 1,000th Subway foot-long. After only a week back at school, my moment of taste bud evolution has already arrived. Having passed my threshold for premade provisions, only one solution remained: attempt to cook.

My past culinary efforts have been no more courageous than tossing a premade Trader Joe’s burrito in the microwave or mixing marinara with pasta. Over the years I’ve been so conditioned to seek instant gratification from fast, over-the-counter eats that I couldn’t imagine myself sauteing or mincing — or any of those other things cooks do in kitchens.

I do, however, come from a family of hardcore foodies. My grandmother is the queen. In her house, food is a cure-all. Tough day at work? Lentil soup. Twisted your ankle? Beef kabob and herb rice with a glass of red wine. If there aren’t plumes of steam and exotic aromas wafting through the house, it’s either because her soap operas are on, or it’s 3 a.m.

No cooking endeavor could be properly executed without my grandma’s wisdom. So I made the call and asked her for recipes that fit the following guidelines: healthy, simple to make (under 15 minutes of preparation), composed of affordable ingredients and possessing some international flair. A little over a minute of deep consideration and she asked: “How about some grilled-chicken couscous salad and cream-of-broccoli soup?”

Next thing I knew, I was standing in the fresh produce section of Trader Joe’s, far from the comfort of the frozen-foods aisle. I couldn’t help but doubt my commitment to cooking as I picked out what I thought were ripe Roma tomatoes. Was I really about to waste all this time and effort when I could just as easily swipe my debit card at Croutons and call it a day?

On the ride home from TJ’s, I tried to reason my decision to cook. Forget the obvious economic benefits of making one $30 grocery trip for healthy, fresh food rather than what might amount to three separate $10 burrito runs on a daily basis — I was equally excited by the fact that my soon-to-be cooking skills would instantly make me more attractive. After all, what’s sexier than a home-cooked meal?

With newfound motivation, I began dicing the tomatoes, onions and bell peppers with a sense of purpose I had previously only exhibited while playing sports or debating politics. After glancing at my haphazard collection of vegetable bits, I learned my first cooking lesson: Wielding a knife like Grandma requires a sense of confidence, technique and dexterity that can only be acquired after years of practice.

Thankfully, the rest was so easy that tomato dicing was half the battle. All I had to do was pour a packet of couscous into the saucepan (note: opening packets is easy) and add two cups chicken broth, one tablespoon olive oil, one-half teaspoon salt, and one-quarter teaspoon black pepper. Then I stirred the mix for about five minutes — fitting well within the confines of my culinary capacity.

After letting the hot couscous fluff in the broth, I added some pre-grilled chicken strips, two sloppily diced Romas and two tablespoons of Italian flat-leaf parsley, then garnished with some lemon juice and green onions. To my astonished delight, I had produced a colorful salad that appeared to be a healthy and balanced entree — and it tasted at least as good as a $7 salad from the Sunshine Store.

The soup proved just as simple. Melting the butter and sauteing the onions produced a confidence-inspiring aroma of onion-y goodness. Once the onions were transparent, I added one cup of water, the chopped bell pepper, the packet of broccoli and a teaspoon of salt. Then I covered the saucepan and let the concoction sit until the veggies had tenderized. Next, I liquefied the contents of the saucepan in the blender, adding milk intermittently until it looked like my sauce was smooth. From there, I emptied the blender back into the pan, added the remainder of the milk and topped it off with a few drops of soy sauce for added flavor. A garnishing of black pepper and a bay leaf for presentation, and voila! In less than half an hour — the same time it would’ve taken to buy and unfreeze the burrito for which I’d always settled — I had a sumptuous-looking salad and steaming soup, with four days’ worth of leftovers to spare.

Perhaps the best part of the whole experience was transferring the salad and soup into their respective bowls. I felt accomplished — almost euphoric. Maybe that’s why the food tasted so good. Of course, I’m nowhere remotely close to cooking (nor wielding a knife) like Grandma, and I’d be lying if I called myself a cook, but the reward for simply trying was well worth my minimal effort.

Muir College senior Daniel McDonald ended his 21st birthday party in a wedding dress, crumpled below a Residential Security Officer’s feet in tears — but not because he was abandoned at the altar.

He’d begun the evening of Sept. 23 innocently, offering drinks to his guests in a corset and red tutu. But when his International House bash spilled out onto I-Walk, a couple uniformed men told everyone it was time to take it inside. McDonald was upset, so his roommate — Muir College junior Lee Montgomery — told him to make a statement.

“I love that kind of thing,” McDonald said. “Whenever I hear that, I’m like, ‘Oh yeah, let’s do that.’”

So McDonald ran inside and threw on the $100 wedding dress he and Montgomery had purchased together at a Pacific Beach thrift store. (Never mind that he didn’t have time to tie pillows on his legs to poof the dress out, as was the plan.) He grabbed a giant suitcase and rushed to the shutdown in hysterics, throwing his slender body to the ground and threatening to move out, between sobs.

The RSOs stared on, as bystanders on balconies snapped photos.

“Everyone get off I-Walk!” one RSO shouted. “Except for the bride. Mind the bride.”

All this from a pale, 6-foot, 128-pound blonde kid who calls himself an introvert.

“I never thought I [stood out] until like a year ago or so,” McDonald said. “I’ve always kind of dressed like how I feel like dressing. And then people were like, ‘Gosh, Dan, you stand out so much.’ And I was like, ‘Do I, really?’”

McDonald is hard to miss. You may have seen him walking to Earl’s Place covered in an amalgamation of rainbows. Or glimmering on Library Walk in a silver sequined wrap. His bright platinum hair matches his bright yellow sandals, which match his yellow Volkswagon Beetle, which matches a yellow loofah he carries around as a fashion accessory.

“People always come up to me and say, ‘Oh, I love your costume, where are you going?’” McDonald said. “And I’m like, ‘Oh, these are my clothes.’ I always like to try new things. I’ve worn mismatched shoes before on purpose. So I’ll wear a loofah as an accessory and maybe eventually it will catch on, and soon you’ll see a bunch of girls on campus matching their outfits to loofahs. And I’ll be the trendsetter. Maybe. We’ll see.”

But how does one become a mastermind trendsetter like McDonald in the first place?

It’s a long story.

McDonald’s parents divorced three months after he was born. His mother Linda — who, according to McDonald, looks like a Swedish supermodel — then swept him away to San Diego. She tried her luck at love again, remarrying when McDonald was six, and then divorcing again when he was 12. At one point, they shared an apartment with McDonald’s grandmother in a shabby El Cajon neighborhood. Eventually, with the help of some child support from her two ex-husbands, they got their own place.

But by his senior year at Grossmont High School in La Mesa, Linda couldn’t pay rent. One evening, the cops came to their apartment, threw their belongings on the street and changed the locks. McDonald and his mother slept on the street next to a mound of their stuff.

The next morning, McDonald took charge. He called a taxi and directed the driver to his grandma’s house.

“I was like, ‘Mom, we can’t be like living on the street,’” he said. “She’s not the most grounded person, so she kind of, like, didn’t realize what was happening. She’s a little eccentric.”

Around the same time, McDonald’s friend Courtney invited him to Monster Massive — a colossal dance party that draws thousands of costume-clad ravers to the Los Angeles Sports Arena every Halloween. He accepted the invitation, since he already had a wardrobe for the occasion, and road-tripped up to LA for some fun.

“I fit into it,” McDonald said. “I super fit into it. When I was there, I was like, ‘Wow, these are my people.’ Like, everyone was crazy dressed. Everyone was having a really good time. And everyone was happy. There was no arguing, you know?”

Monster Massive was a night of many firsts for McDonald — including, but not limited to, trying ecstasy and meeting his rave parents: two lesbians named Cupcake and Stardust. They dubbed him Fluid, to describe both his sexuality and his dance style.

Accordingly, McDonald identifies as pansexual — a sexual orientation he describes as “fluid sexuality.”

“It’s kind of like bisexual but bisexual has this binary I don’t like: It limits you to two options,” he said. “But not animals. I don’t like to fuck cabbages or cats or anything.”

When he first arrived at UCSD, McDonald didn’t feel as comfortable showing his true colors. He said he dressed more conservatively and was still dating his high-school girlfriend, who wasn’t too happy about his pansexuality. After their midyear breakup, he joined several Muir College organizations and became more flamboyant.

But McDonald’s pinnacle of fame came when he spent a year abroad, from June 2007 to January 2008, in Sweden. With a new webcam and some free time on his hands, Swedish Sapphire (a stage character named after his national heritage and birthstone) was born. McDonald filmed steamy remakes of whatever song he dug at the time — mostly of the Britney and Gaga nature — with a tiny camera, some careful angling and lots of costumes changes.

“I always thought Chris Crocker was cool,” McDonald said. “He makes these crazy videos and then he posts them on YouTube. I figured I could too. And so I did. And I definitely advertised it.”

One day, he joined the Swedish YouTube network, and suddenly became a mini-celebrity. His view count shot to 1,800, and at one point he held the No. 10 ranking on the country’s network. People even began to recognize him in public.

Since then, McDonald has made about 34 videos — some of which all his family and friends have viewed (grandma got a peak at Thanksgiving dinner). Though he hasn’t reached Crocker’s celebrity status, he’s still recognized locally.

“Last week, I was coming back form Earl’s Place, and this group of frat guys way behind me was like, ‘Swedish Sapphire, turn around,’” he said. “I waved and they were like, ‘K, cool, thanks.’”

Although McDonald hopes to continue filming projects on the side after he becomes an opthamologist (he interned with an eye doctor this summer and plans to apply to medical school in 2011), he understands his side job might be difficult for his patients to swallow.

“I’m worried because once I get up to a professional level its going to be hard,” McDonald said. “It might not be as accepting as it is now. And if the old lady whose eyes I’m fixing sees me on the Internet half-naked and is like, ‘Wait, that’s my eye doctor,’ that might be a bit of a shock.”

In the meantime, though, McDonald is waiting to hear back from Rich’s and Numbers — two gay clubs at which he auditioned for a go-go dancing position earlier this year. You never know when the next wedding dress tantrum will precipitate — rumor has it McDonald is planning on a fishnet-clad weight-lifting session at RIMAC sometime this year.

“I really like to have people question reality and the norm,” he said. “People live their mundane, everyday life, and all of a sudden they see some crazy drag queen running out of a tree, and its like, ‘Whoa.’”

Readers can contact Alyssa Bereznak at [email protected].

[caption id="attachment_893" align="alignleft" width="200" caption="Joshua Meador/Guardian"][/caption]

[caption id="attachment_859" align="alignleft" width="300" caption="Earth"][/caption]

E arly next Sunday morning — if you’re still awake after a night of debauchery — peer into the dawning atmosphere at 6:10 a.m. Against the fixed backdrop of dim blinking stars, look for a bright dot moving purposefully across the sky. What appears to be a mere speck to the naked eye is really the size of a football field, spinning 200 miles above our heads at over 17,000 miles per hour. You’ve landed on the International Space Station.

Later this month, from Oct. 20 to Oct. 23, a Nikon Electronic Still Camera aboard the ISS will snap photographs of the Earth based on requests from middle-school students throughout the world. And facilitating the entire process — from school outreach to telling NASA when and where to take the pictures — is a group of 10 to 15 UCSD undergrads, serving on the team as interns.

The images are taken as part of ISS EarthKAM, a NASA-sponsored program that aims to educate young students about the Earth from the vantage point of space.

According to Karen Flammer — research physicist who holds a doctorate in space physics and serves as the primary faculty advisor for the EarthKAM program at UCSD — the main focus of the project is to get young students excited about science. Flammer helps develop curriculum that revolves around the use of the images taken by EarthKAM for middle-school teachers and students.

And although KAM stands for Knowledge Acquired by Middle Schools, elementary and high schools have also taken their places behind the camera.

According to Flammer, Photo requests to the EarthKAM Web site have included specific countries, land formations, weather patterns — even natural disasters. UCSD students then process these requests and transmit pertinent information to the International Space Station via NASA’s Johnson Space Center.

Based on instructional files created by the undergrads, the camera then snaps photographs of the Earth. These images are transmitted to NASA for archiving before being sent back to UCSD to be uploaded to the EarthKAM Datasystem.

Within 24 hours of submitting their requests, middle-school students can access the Datasystem to retrieve their pictures. According to Flammer, they have used the images for school projects such as tracking disaster paths, mapping land area and calculating the size of farmland.

The program is likewise benificial for the participating UCSD students, who receive specialized training while to facilitating the successful completion of each mission. As a primarily research-funded university (cash-strapped as it currently may be), UCSD is most often touted for the cutting-edge innovations of its faculty and graduate students. But over on the first floor of the Science and Engineering Research Facility building, you’ll find undergraduate scientists controlling a great portion of the background operations that make ISS EarthKAM so successful. Students work in teams dedicated to managing specific aspects of the program.

UCSD alumna Liz Kain, who was part of EarthKAM for four years before graduating in 2008, said the program is a valuable opportunity for undergraduates to be part of something substantive.

“The school team was speaking with and educating students from all over the world. We worked directly with people at Houston, at the Johnson Space Center. You could listen to the austronauts. We developed a program that’s actually used on the International Space Station! We joke about looking up in the sky and saying, ‘Yup, [our work] is up there.’”

Many of the participating UCSD students said they stumbled on the program while browsing the aerospace tab of the Academic Internship Program database. Others are friends of friends who found their way to Flammer’s office by word of mouth.

Though AIP interns receive academic credit, some students receive paid scholarships, and others choose to volunteer.

“It gives them the experience of a hands-on, space-related project,” Flammer said. “Some even go on to work for NASA.”

Christie Carlile, a 2009 UCSD alumna, is one such student.

“I went to space camp in the 5th grade and that sealed the deal,” Carlile said.

Carlile was designated Chief of the UCSD Mission Operations Center — which is modeled after NASA’s Mission Control — before becoming a “co-op,” or participant in NASA’s Cooperative Education Program. The program offers paid positions to college students who juggle classes while working for NASA.

Five weeks ago, Carlile became a full-time employee of the Johnson Space Center.

Sixth College senior Allen Jiang began as an AIP intern one year ago, but elected to stay on after his quarter with the Academic Internship Program ended.

Jiang said he feels EarthKAM provides an invaluable educational service to participating middle schools.

“It invigorates them and gets them involved in learning about the Earth and space.”

Kain — who now works as a project manager at Apple but credits the trajectory of her career path to the undergraduate experience at EarthKAM — agreed.

“Sometimes you get direct feedback from kids and you feel like you’re perhaps inspiring future engineers or scientists,” Kain said. “And even if it’s only one kid, it’s gratifying.”

The International Space Station will be visible in the early morning skies of San Diego from Saturday, Oct. 10 to Wednesday, Oct. 14. Check www.nasa.gov for exact times and durations.

Readers can contact Aprille Muscara at [email protected].

[caption id="attachment_911" align="alignleft" width="300" caption="Shacking up in Clairemont, Comickaze brings together an assorted milieu of comic books, graphic novels, collectibles and figurines that both obsessed geeks and on-the-fringe fans can appreciate. (Daniell Caddell/Guardian)"][/caption]

Ever since 20th Century Fox exhumed X-Men, the comic-book cash crop has been making the most of an endless harvest. In the past five years alone, there’s been enough Marvel-based movies to keep Tobey Maguire set for life.

Considering San Diego’s Comic-Con International brought in a record flock of costumed geeks this summer, it’s only fair that we should also house one of best comic book stores in SoCal — an unpretentious cache in Clairemont with its own MySpace, book club, blog and assorted collection of plastic-encased Stormtroopers, appropriately named Comickaze.

By the time you finish parking and lift your gaze towards the over-crowded window staring you in the face, you’ll realize that Comickaze isn’t nearly as genteel nor spacious as the Barnes & Noble you’re used to. Judging by the over-jammed bookshelves, wire racks, countertops and windows, it’s outgrown its modest origins and opted for offbeat clutter a while ago. Boxes, box sets and the more popular members of League of Justice line the walls, while T-shirts with screenprints of Gabrielle from Xena (uh, I was 10) hang on racks propped up throughout the store.

The infinite bric-a-brac, DIY crafts and miscellaenous merchandise are all part of Comickaze’s quaint appeal: offering more than comic books for those of us so uncommitted to collecting that we couldn’t tell you if $500 was a decent asking price for the first Venom cameo in the Amazing Spider-Man series. (According to eBay, it is.) Comics might be their specialty, and the first two syllables of their moniker — not to mention roughly 70 percent of their store — but they’re keen on everything from neon lights and glassware of Wonder Woman and Wolverine, to life-size busts and bookends of Hellboy.

In simple terms of comic books, Comickaze is stocked with all the extras: special editions, back issues and complete collections. Whether you’re pining the latest installment of the Umbrella Academy (written by Gerard Way of My Chemical Romance), the early issues of new medieval epic Mouse Guard (complete with signed copies) or even one of the endless derivatives of a Stan Lee orginal (Spider-Man Loves Mary Jane, Justice League: Cry for Justice), Comickaze’s got enough pages to keep anyone in the store for hours.

Bookshelves wrapping the store walls host most of the selection, including nearly 25 shelves dedicated to Marvel alone. Eisner, Miller and Moore are a guarantee — and if there’s anything you want that they don’t have, they can usually order it for you.

Imagine an abridged, less-pricey version of Comic-Con, crammed into a midsized retail store — minus the tawdry Tinkerbell — you’ve got a pretty good idea of what Comickaze feels like.

The only category it loses in is manga — which, compared to the UCSD Bookstore, only takes up a single wire rack. But when you consider how much you gain, it’s a small price to pay for a chance to escape the seedy confines of Price Center.

The Bottom Line:

If you’re looking for the best place for manga, look no further than the UCSD Bookstore. For everything else: Comickaze is Comic-Con without the costumes or killer price tags.

Comickaze
5517 Clairemont Mesa Blvd. #A
San Diego, California 92117
www.comickaze.com

Last month, a group of eight Scripps scientists embarked on a 20-day expedition to capture the Pacific Ocean’s most elusive new specimen: garbage. The voyage was the first comprehensive study of marine debris’ effects on the ocean — though the collection of trash accumulating in the Pacific isn’t exactly novel.

The North Pacific Gyre, a collection of currents which form a vortex between South East Asia and North America, is estimated to have amassed enough coastal waste to span Texas two times over, and has earned the nickname the Great Pacific Garbage Patch.

Despite its estimated size, the trash patch isn’t yet a well-known world attraction. Ocean researcher Captain Charles Moore stumbled upon it on his way back from an offshore yacht race in 1997 and published his findings on the area. Soon afterward, the Algalita Marine Research Foundation began integrating this information into its educational presentations.

In November 2007, Scripps Institution of Oceanography graduate students Miriam Goldstein, Meg Rippy, Darcy Taniguchi, Jesse Powell and Alison Cawood attended one such seminar detailing Moore’s marine debris discoveries.

Taking Charge

After the lecture, the students discussed the garbage patch over lunch. Goldstein took charge, asking the others if they’d be interested in researching the biological effects of the marine debris.

Each grad had a different area of focus that could aid the project — from Taniguchi’s knowledge of phytoplankton to Powell’s interest in oceanographic equipment — so they agreed to write individual parts of a research project proposal.

Ultimately, they hoped that University of California Ship Funds would finance their study, despite hear-say that funding for student-led expeditions was seldom awarded.

About six months later, in May 2008, Goldstein learned the proposal had been approved.

“I was like, ‘Oh crap!’ We actually have to do this,” she said.

The Race for Funding

Then the real work began. Goldstein, who was named the project’s chief scientist due to her initial sense of leadership, needed money for what was now to be called the Scripps Environmental Accumulation of Plastic Expedition. The Ship Fund only agreed to pay for 13 of the 20 proposed days of research at sea — not including funds for transportation and supplies.

The SEAPLEX vessel would leave from San Diego but return to Newport Beach, meaning that almost everyone would need a ride home. In terms of equipment, they lacked basic research accessories — including hundreds of glass jars to hold samples.

There was also the minor issue of finding someone to lend them about $20,000 worth of oceanographic equipment.

“We had no money to back the equipment,” Goldstein said. “So we had to find people who would lend it to us knowing that if it was damaged, we couldn’t replace it.”

But the contributions rolled in. The Scripps Center for Marine Biodiversity and Education, the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration South West Marine Center and a slew of interested professors lent the SEAPLEX students the gear they needed.

NOAA even recommended Goldstein grab a beer at the Newport Beach Brewing Company when she returned.

Next came the issue of what to do about those last seven days, which remained unfunded. The solution came when SEAPLEX found its perfect match: Project Kaisei, a nonprofit dedicated to raising awareness about the Garbage Patch, lobbying policymakers to address its existence and developing oceanographic waste-removal equipment.

Kaisei fronted the bill, and a couple members even tagged along for the ride — including cofounder and director Douglas Woodring.

Ultimately, Woodring’s goals in collaborating with Scripps boiled down to environmental credibility.

“We have two battles,” Woodring said. “In the ocean itself, it’s figuring out how to fix the damage we’ve done. On land, there’s another set of circumstances for policy to allow this to happen. That’s why there’s a big compliment with the Scripps scientists and Project Kaisei. They’ve got the good science to back us up when we contact policymakers and say there’s a problem.”

The SEAPLEX team had grown to 14 members: eight scientists — including Scripps professor and faculty advisor Jim Leichter — three volunteers to aid in data collection, three representatives from Project Kaisei and two others in charge of communication and outreach.

SETTING SAIL

On Aug. 2, the SEAPLEX team joined a 12-man crew — composed of three able-bodied seamen, four engineers, two mates, two cooks and a captain — aboard the New Horizon. Since no one knew just how much litter was considered normal to be in the water, they headed 12 hours west of San Diego to sample water at a reference point outside the Garbage Patch and get a feel for the team’s chemistry.

After picking up some plastic tidbits, they sputtered further west at 11.5 miles per hour toward the North Pacific Gyre.

Though Goldstein chose the coordinates of the destination based on other reports about the trash superhighway’s location, there was no guarantee the team would find what it was looking for. The Garbage Patch isn’t an island anyone can spot from a telescope. In fact, the pieces of debris at its surface are so small that they are hardly visible to the naked eye.

But finally, after four and a half days of traveling, they hit the debris jackpot: litter in the form of shattered plastic, buckets, strainers, buoys, fishing nets, the occasional rope and a lone construction worker’s hard hat.

The SEAPLEX team worked 24 hours a day in 12-hour shifts to maximize their research time. Members collected samples with different tows — nets dragged through the ocean for the purpose of catching debris — and bottled them for the trip back.

Though most scientists were studying different elements of the ecosystem — whether phytoplankton or deep-sea fish — the amount of garbage they found in between was hard to ignore. Out of 132 surface samples, the SEAPLEX team found garbage in 100 consecutive tows at the eastern rim of the Garbage Patch.

“There was no sign of anyone anywhere for weeks, except that we found everyone’s trash out there,” Taniguchi said. “We could obviously only see really well what was on the surface, so who knows what’s below the surface. We were really literally and figuratively just skimming the surface because we only looked at a small area of where it could potentially be. It was just very sad to see it as consistently as we did, because nothing in the ocean is found that regularly. But that trash sure was.”

But the trip wasn’t all buoys and fishnets. The SEAPLEX team also discovered gooseneck barnacles, crabs, sponges and anemones that had converted the trash into their living quarters.

“Everyone says, ‘They have a place to live, so it’s not that bad, right?’” Goldstein said. “But not exactly.”

According to Goldstein, the garbage poses a number of threats to sea life. Animals that eat the debris may be harmed, and garbage to which animals attach themselves could potentially float into neighboring ecosystems, in turn disrupting their balance.

A GLIMMER OF HOPE

Despite the sobering amount of waste the SEAPLEX explorers encountered, they were still able to enjoy the abundant marine life below.

Pete Davison, a fifth-year Scripps graduate student, retrieved a vampire fish and an anglerfish, which he plans on dissecting in search of ingested plastic. The team also spotted a dead giant squid the size of an adult human and hauled it on deck to examine the carcass. They kept it’s beak as a souvenir.

Taniguchi, whose primary focus was examining microbial communities within the garbage patch, worked from 8 p.m. to noon in order to consistently compare her samples with others in the Scripps reserve. On her last evening of sampling, she noticed that the waves around her were glowing. The light came straight from her research subjects: bioluminescent, 6-inch pyrozome organisms flickering in the breaking waves.

After a total of 20 days on the ocean, the New Horizon delivered the SEAPLEX team back to Newport Beach, samples in hand.

Now, the Scripps scientists are rushing to complete their research and publish a report detailing the garbage patch’s effects on the ecosystem. Though projects designed to help clear the area’s trash are still in beginning stages, the team hopes to provide as much information as possible to the scientific community and activist organizations that support ocean cleanup.

“If you want to know how to clean it up, you need to know where it is, how big it is and what sort of material it is,” Goldstein said. “We’re providing the basic facts.”

Scientists from the SEAPLEX team hope to release a report on the Great Pacific Garbage Patch by next year, and to encourage environmentalists to use their findings as a lobbying asset with which to influence policymakers.

“This is about science, not politics,” said Jesse Dubler, a 2008 Earl Warren College alumnus who volunteered on the SEAPLEX team. “We need to coordinate among ourselves to establish this single World Environmental Organization as soon as possible, so that we’d have the resources to defend ourselves from the environmental consequences of actions committed in the past few decades.”

Readers can contact Alyssa Bereznak at [email protected].

Thursday 1/31/02

Drummer Billy Mintz has played with the likes of Lee Konitz, Eddie Daniels and Charles Lloyd. Mintz will team up with former Zappa trombonist Bruce Fowler. The cover is $10 and the show starts at 8 p.m. at Dizzy's. Call (858) 270-7467 for all the information.

Singer-songwriter Jonatha Brooke has a lot to sing about. Her solo release, ""10 Cent Wings"" touches upon the sudden death of a close friend, failed relationships and a marriage heading downhill. Her most recent solo album, ""Steady Pull,"" also incorporates a drum machine with her backing band for a more modern sound. Brooke performs at the Belly Up Tavern at 8 p.m. Tickets start at $15.

Friday 2/01/02

Night two of Club Ritmo opens with master DJs, the X-ecutioners. The event is at Porter's Pub at UCSD. Doors open at 8:30 p.m. and tickets are $8 for students and $10 for general admission. Call the UCSD Box Office for ticket information at (858) 534-TIXS. Look to the preview on page 8 for more.

Buddy Guy is such a great guitar player that guitarist Eric Clapton has called Guy the greatest guitar player in the world. You can catch the greatness at 4th & B when Guy comes to play the blues. The show starts at 8 p.m. and tickets start at $24.

Senegal native Baaba Maal represents world music in the best possible way. Funky sounds with African nuances are sure to result in a party at Mandeville Auditorium. Sultry Ethiopian singer Gigi opens for Maal with more jazzy sounds filtering through funk. The event starts at 7:30 p.m. Call the UCSD Box Office at (858) 534-TIXS for more information.

The Bi-National Mambo Orchestra comes to rock Dizzy's in downtown San Diego. Trumpeter Bill Caballero leads this 20-piece orchestra. The show starts at 9 p.m. and cover is $10. Call Dizzy's at (858) 270-7467 for more information and directions.

Sunday 2/03/02

The new Lou Reed? Or maybe some Iggy Pop? No. It's The Strokes with their 1970s rock sound. If you were lucky enough to get tickets before they sold out, remember to get to 4th & B by 8 p.m. That's when the show starts. The rest of you? Read the article on this page and wish that you were there.

Monday 2/04/02

Jazz Project Big Band will feature arranger Marty Conley and soloists Bruce Cameron, Dick McGuane, David Castel de Oro and Gaspar Constantini. This group of talented musicians will jazz things up from 7:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m. at Dizzy's. The cover is $5. Call (858) 270-7467 for the information that you need.

Wednesday 2/06/02

Black History Month Tribute at Dizzy's features the steel drummer PAPA and other acts. The event starts at 7 p.m. and the cover is your donation. Call (858) 270-7467 for more information.

Look to the hiatus calendar for events in and around UCSD.

All tickets can be purchased through Ticketmaster by calling (619) 220-8497 or by going to http://www.ticketmaster.com unless otherwise noted.

The Strokes will stop at 4th & B on Feb. 3 as part of their world tour, playing their only California date at a venue that may not be able to contain the buzz this band has created lately.

The band is touted for its 1970s sound, which is nothing like anything else currently going on in rock. Their album, ""Is This It,"" has been proclaimed this year's best album by both ""Entertainment Weekly"" and ""New York"" magazine. The album was also mentioned on numerous top 10 lists in the United States and was nominated for best international album in the United Kingdom at the Brit Awards.

Despite the New York roots of The Strokes, their popularity abroad has grown faster than it has at home. This could be due in great part to their connection with the fashion industry. Lead singer Julian Casablancas is the son of the head of one of the world's largest modeling agencies.

In the world of fashion, the wave of influence moves from East to West. This could explain why the band is playing only one California show and around 15 on the East Coast, not to mention the fact that it is playing nearly double the amount of shows in Europe and the rest of the world than it is playing here in the States.

If The Strokes follow the recent fashion trends, they should be huge in the United States in about six months.

It will certainly be a rare treat to see: The Strokes playing a venue the size of 4th & B. Their tremendous international success ensures that future shows will be at larger, less personal venues.

Fresh off of hit television shows ""Saturday Night Live"" and ""Conan O'Brien,"" The Strokes are promoting themselves to the college-age crowd, who they will need in order to move to the top of the charts.

Unfortunately, the show at 4th & B will be for those of legal drinking age only. Look for them next year at a much larger venue near you.

The Calling

Camino Palmero

RCA Records

***

While the group The Calling may not sound too familiar, their song ""Wherever You Will Go"" will. It has been getting lots of airplay on the radio and considerable time on MTV. It was also performed live in the film ""Coyote Ugly.""

""Camino Palmero"" is the group's first RCA record. This group consists of Alex Band singing vocals, Aaron Kamin and Sean Woolstenhulme on guitar, Billy Mohler on the bass and Nate Wood on drums.

The 11-song album was written by Band and Kamin, the founding members of the group. Many of the songs consist of the usual theme of a romance gone wrong and the feelings of the one who was jilted, such as ""Adrienne,"" with the chorus, ""Adrienne, I thought I knew you/ Once again, you used me, used me.""

However, there are a few songs that have unique themes that haven't been overdone several times already this year. One such example is ""We're Forgiven,"" which calls the listener back to reality with lines such as ""I pass them on the streets/ Their bloodstained hands and dirty feet/ And I can't ignore them/ Any more than I already have.""

The music is not exceptionally good or original, but The Calling maintains a strong pop sound that carries through the album. Each track has a slightly different sound, but the album sounds rather uniform in tone. Some of the songs, such as ""Wherever You Will Go,"" have a ballad quality that is quite soothing. Then there is ""Unstoppable,"" which sounds more like alternative rock.

This album is good, but not great. Many of the songs sound rather familiar, but there are a few that make this album a good one to spend the ride home with.

-- Jessica Long

Staff Writer

Various Artists

Paris Lounge

Musicrama

***

There is a distinctive sound to French electronica. Daft Punk and Bob Sinclar have been a couple of the more popular artists to come out of France.

Daft Punk capitalizes on smooth beats and thick bass grooves, and their vocodered voices are a distinct part of their music. Sinclar flavors his music with some more disco-influenced sounds. The French electronic sound also incorporates a lot of jazz and Brazilian influences.

""Paris Lounge"" is a healthy collection of French grooves. This two-disc compilation is appropriately titled ""Paris By Day"" and ""Paris By Night.""

The first disc, ""Paris By Day,"" offers more relaxing tunes. They are more jazzy and incorporate a live sound -- especially in the drums and the basslines. There are a couple of tracks that may sound a bit cheesy, but you can almost feel that French atmosphere.

The second disc, ""Paris By Night,"" is where the album truly shines. This seamless mix of tunes gives us an insight into the Parisian nightlife.

Tracks by St. Germain and Stephane B start the disc with a more jazz-influenced sound. The album progresses into a deeper groove with ""A New Life"" by Ginkgo. This disc closes with a hard-hitting techno tune by Harmix.

Those who are familiar with the relatively smooth French sound will find themselves playing this album all the time. And the music sounds fresh because this isn't some greatest hits collection.

However, those who find a lot of Sasha or Paul Oakenfold albums in their collection and not any Air or Bob Sinclar might not find the same pleasure in this album.

-- Joseph Lee

Hiatus Editor

Lupine Howl

The Carnivorous Lunar Activities of Lupine Howl

Beggars Banquet

***

Spiritualized was a spiritual group. Their lush melodies with minimalist beats and hypnotic sounds entranced an entire nation. By late 1997, Spiritualized was at the height of their musical prowess, holding a memorable concert at the Royal Albert Hall.

But by the next year, singer and guitarist Jason Pierce fired the rest of his bandmates. Within a year, bass player Sean Cook, guitarist Mike Mooney and drummer Damon Reece moved on to form Lupine Howl.

Constant touring and the suffocation of their creativity worsened adverse effects that had already settled into the minds of Cook, Mooney and Reece.

Lupine Howl recently released their first full-length, titled, ""The Carnivorous Lunar Activities of Lupine Howl."" And this album is ferocious.

Imagine The Verve on uppers and a less-somber Richard Ashcroft at the helm of the band. The result is wailing guitars, soaring atmospherics, dark electronics, filtered vocals and a modern-day psychedelic groove.

The sonic appeal of Lupine Howl is most obvious on their 10-minute epic, ""Carnival."" The swirling drum loops, fuzzy guitars and lo-fi squeals that build up and break down make ""Carnival"" a wonderfully produced track.

""The Jam That Ate Itself"" is a powerful wall of sound pushing Cook's words front and center, ""I'm stranded here between fucked and insane killing time 'till I gotta go.""

This album may not appeal to everyone but you'll find comfort in the sonic-high that Lupine Howl gives you when it's injected into your ears.

-- Joseph Lee

Hiatus Editor

The A.S. Council will soon present the second night in its series of shows for Club Ritmo, which will feature the talented turntablists the X-Ecutioners.

The X-Ecutioners, the New York-based quartet of DJs, are nationally and internationally renowned for their remarkable turntable stylings. Formed in 1989, the group is comprised of four members: Rob Swift, Roc Raida, Total Eclipse and Mista Sinista.

Formerly known as the X-Men, the DJ crew prides itself on its ability to create tracks entirely by hand, as opposed to using samplers and sequencing machines. The X-Ecutioners have dedicated their lives to perfecting the art of DJing, which they describe as ""mixing, scratching, body tricks and beat-juggling.""

The crew pioneered beat-juggling, described by Swift as ""manipulating a kick snare and high hat off a record and reorganizing the sounds to create a totally different composition the same way one would do with a sampling or sequencing machine.""

The X-Ecutioners are among the first all-DJ outfits ever to sign a recording contract. This amazingly gifted foursome can be heard on their new album, ""Built From Scratch,"" to be available in late February.

The club targets the 18-and-over crowd and is open to the general public, so if you're looking for some slamming beats and all-around cool DJing, then stop by Porter's Pub to see the renowned turntable masters, the X-Ecutioners.

Please look to the hiatus calendar on page 11 for ticket and time information.