Saturday, August 19, 2017

Everything Causes Cancer, But I Couldn’t Care Less

In elementary school,  someone told me that if my hand was bigger than my face, I had cancer. Falling prey to this line is akin to excessively heeding the “experts” who report that all things good and normal in this world are potential cancer hazards. You’re just setting yourself up for lavish panic attacks.

Take a Chance, and Go for a Pixie

When a celebrity gets a haircut, it becomes front-page news on both sides of the Atlantic, and Yahoo News writers break their keyboards in excitement. Last week, “The Hunger Games” actress Jennifer Lawrence became...

You Will Meet a Tall, Dark Reality

When Woody Allen’s sexual abuse allegations resurfaced last week and loyal fans slipped into a state of shock, I was reminded of an affliction called the Paris Syndrome. The name conjures up images of wannabe-hipsters...

It’s Alright to Skip Revelle in Rome

I went through the WebReg enrollment process last week with a sinking sense of finality. By signing up to spend my final quarter of UCSD in the likes of Pepper Canyon and Otterson Hall,...

Daylight Saving is a Convenient Falsehood

Winding my clock back one hour this past Sunday felt like taking a Sharpie and willfully changing the expiration date on a carton of milk.

2007 Called, and It Wants Its Phone Back

I’m only about seven years late to the party, but I finally joined the digital age by ditching my beat-up “dumbphone” in favor of an iPhone 5C. For those of you who can afford the...

Friends Forever or Friends Until June?

Last Sunday, as I clinked glasses of sparkling wine with my roommate over unpronounceable Italian delicacies, I came to a somber realization: The two of us would be going our separate ways after graduation...

Nostalgia Trips Aren’t All Happy-Go-Lucky

Last weekend, I trekked over to Balboa Park with a few old friends to recreate pictures and memories of a day trip we had taken together freshman year. We had lost touch numerous quarters...

The Fun Does Not End After College

As a senior, transitioning from a carefree San Diego summer back to the daily class grind was especially difficult. Three years ago, I eagerly went to every Welcome Week event, found all the Stuart Collection...

Plush Seats Are Comfy, But They Aren’t Clean

If there’s one place on campus I hate, it’s Solis 107. No, it’s not because of some past dispute with a professor over getting a B+ instead of an A-, or because the clock there sometimes lies that class is over when there are still 10 minutes left — it’s because of the chairs. I cannot bring myself to sit on them.