Scheduled host Eddie Murphy (nothing screams “suave” like the Nutty Professor) called it quits in solidarity with friend and Academy Awards producer Brett Ratner, who resigned after using an anti-gay slur in a televised Q&A (double suave). The consequent vacancy led Jim Henson fans from all walks of life to wait and hope that, in this fledgling decade of glorious change, we’d see the once-politically unimaginable come to fruition: the first Muppet host of the Academy Awards. 

But the dream was short-lived; Billy Crystal got the part (admittedly backed by a dynamite ad campaign) and none of this would be of much consequence if it all didn’t seem to vindicate the infinite snub festival that these immensely important puppets will have to endure this February. 

Only recently have the Oscars begun acknowledging “family movies” as serious contenders, and though their choices have been surprisingly commendable (movies made by Pixar), they’ve all been relatively similar and, above all else, ultra-modern. In fact, not a single movie in Pixar’s arsenal has been without some hefty contemporary proverb in tow. “WALL-E” weaved the consequences of consumer greed and excess into beautifully imagined scenes of deep space, “Finding Nemo” was a bountiful cornucopia of childhood loss, wayward fatherhood and the importance of letting go and “Monsters, Inc.” pulled the cute, fuzzy rug out from under naive children to reveal the disillusionment of a voiceless working class in a coldhearted and impersonal capitalist industry.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m Pixar-obsessive, and it’s this kind of multi-layered storytelling that allows Pixar to reach such a diverse audience. But what made “The Muppets” so fresh and unforgettable was that it was so remarkably un-modern. Unlike its more recent predecessors in the franchise, “The Muppets” didn’t concern itself with adapting. (In fact, it lampooned the very notion, introducing the comically terrifying Moopets — “A hard, cynical act for a hard, cynical world,” Chris Cooper’s maniacal villain Tex Richman explained.) Of course, the entire gang was present, along with all the dorky vaudevillian schtick, self-referential humor, plenty of fourth-wall destruction and a pitch-perfect batch of songs from perhaps the most worthy of modern Muppet collaborators, Flight of the Conchords’ Brett McKenzie. Most striking, however, was how “The Muppets” still felt like an untouched style of entertainment all its own. 

There’s a great sequence in Charlie Kaufman’s “Being John Malkovich” where Malkovich becomes internationally renowned in the absurd craft of puppeteering, moving audiences to tears and even inspiring other high-profile actors to follow in his footsteps. It’s an amusing satire of the art world’s arbitrary standards, but isn’t this essentially what happened to Jim Henson? After the fact, the Muppet formula may seem like a natural winner, but no one could’ve initially predicted that this avant-garde filmmaker-turned-children’s puppeteer would forever change the landscape of G-rated entertainment (Let’s not forget “Sesame Street,” “Fraggle Rock,” “Labyrinth,” “The Dark Crystal,” and, of course, the tragically-overlooked Jedi Master Yoda). 

Henson was successful because he so willingly embodied the ultimate cult artist. Not only did he invent new worlds, he literally invented new, complicated characters to inhabit these worlds. Equal parts product of the love-and-psychedelia hippie era and response to the increasingly-homogenized Disney, Henson miraculously weaned a generation of kids off cartoon characters who spent most of their time beating the shit out of each other, in order to simply chat with neighbors on the most racially diverse (and longest running) street in morning television history, or mingle with the strangely intellectual Muppets on the “Muppet Show.” He even managed to include adult artists, musicians and actors in these worlds (Video artist William Wegman’s anthropomorphic weimaraners on “Sesame Street” shall forever hold a special place in my heart), effectively creating a fertile multicultural bazaar custom-fit for the curious mind of a child. Henson’s importance cannot be overstated. 

So while America may not be ready for a Muppet in the Oscar limelight, let’s hope our humble felt friends are not completely forgotten when the red carpet is unfurled. This year, “The Muppets” assured audiences that there’s no rush to grow up. Some of us could use the reminder.